Innocence and Grace
by AJ Morrelli
Summary: Can a mage afraid of commitment make a difference for a bard who could use a little trust?  Set post-Awakening  and before DA2 came out.
1. Chapter 1

((Disclaimer first, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story. Secondly, this was brought to my attention during a Valentine's prompt. Too bad it originally took me a month to write the thing and then longer to get it up here. Hope you enjoy!))

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><p>It was the girlish squeals that first got his attention.<p>

The only woman whom he knew to be in the main hall of the keep was the commander and Warden-Commander Elissa Cousland did not squeal like a maid who had caught the attention of a dashing rogue.

Did she?

Quickening his pace, lest this unique event turn out to be something that would disappear as quickly as a Fade dream, Anders stopped in the doorway as he caught sight of the Commander clasping arms with another woman.

Her hair was what first drew his eye. An impossible to ignore mingling of braids and straight red hair that just covered her neck. Leathers, or at least he thought, given that the material didn't seem to have the same look as, say, Nathaniel's armor. It was skin, certainly, but seemed more...supple than hide. Two daggers framed her hips, one faintly crackling with lightning and the other, though it looked plain, fairly sung with power, something he could just sense, even if he couldn't see the enchantments on it. There was also a bow slung over her shoulder that looked nearly as tall as the woman herself but in excellent condition. Nathaniel would know more about that than he, but he could at least pride himself on knowing a fine weapon when he saw it.

"It has been much too long, has it not, Elli?" There was no disguising the woman's origins, which may have explained the touch of refinement he picked up in her voice.

"I couldn't agree more, Leli."

Both of them started giggling again and they shared an embrace that spoke of familiarity and, more importantly, camaraderie. Not wanting to intrude upon the moment further, the mage started to back out of the room when Elissa caught sight of him over the other's shoulder.

"Ah, looks like you get to meet one of my Wardens right away." She beckoned him closer. "Leliana, this is Anders, senior among the few mages we have here."

The red-head turned and he found himself under a pair of studious blue eyes. Starting, he noticed, at his feet, her gaze traveled upward, lingering at his chest and finally meeting his own gaze. A half-smile came to her lips and he watched her eyes lid demurely.

"A pleasure, and a pity," she remarked, her attention going to Elissa. "Seems this one is safe from having me as his tyrant of an instructor."

Anders' brows went up at that, turning his curious look on the commander. He also closed the distance between the three of them, intending on greeting Leliana properly.

"Leli is going to be assisting some of our rogues in their techniques. Nathaniel does a fair job, but there's certain skills that I know he doesn't excel at. Hopefully the two of them will compliment each other nicely."

Offering his hand to Leliana when he was close enough, Anders gently held her fingers as he brought them to his lips, laying a kiss at her knuckles. "Hopefully he doesn't compliment her too much. His flattery might start to seem insincere." He grinned.

Leliana laughed. "Should I worry over this Nathaniel, my friend?" She cast a glance to Elissa.

The other woman shook her head. "If you do, I want you to tell me because someone will be in _so _much trouble..."

"Oh? This sounds like a story I simply must hear." One brow arched upward.

"I promise you plenty of details later. Shall we get you settled?" Elissa looped her arm with the other woman's and began to lead her from the hall.

"Lead the way, my friend. Show me more of your grand new home."

Anders almost followed the two of them, but thought better of it. Given the familiar way the Commander lead Leliana away, it was clear she wanted time with the woman herself. Watching them go, he frowned just slightly, suddenly regretting that he hadn't the proper training to garner her attention later on.

Realizing that he likely looked strange simply standing in the middle of the hall, he shook his head and continued on his way to his workshop once again. As he went, he mused over the scent that he'd caught the faintest hint of as he'd drawn Leliana's hand to his lips, wondering if, perhaps, it might be as exotic as the woman herself.


	2. Chapter 2

((Disclaimer first, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story. Secondly, sorry for the delay. Site was being wonky there for a bit. Bah.))

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><p>"So," Leliana drolled. "Who is this Nathaniel and why should I be wary of him?"<p>

They weren't even out of the hall and she couldn't resist getting gossip from her friend. It had been ages since she'd seen Elissa and to have her hinting around a man's name was certainly intriguing enough.

The Warden gave her a sly look. "Well, I suppose you could say that I inherited him with the Keep. He's the son of the former arl and was apparently here when I arrived."

Leliana didn't trust her friend's look. Her brow furrowed as she realized there was something about that statement that she was missing. The son of the former arl? Who _had_ Elli received these lands from? When the realization hit her, she stopped, jerking the other woman to a halt.

"He's a Howe? He's the son of that...that..."

"And nothing like his father, thank the Maker. There's a slight resemblance. There's no denying that. But once we got over the fact that he'd initially come here to kill me, we found out-what?"

"If I wasn't there when you spared Zevran's life, I'd think you mad." Leliana shook her head.

"As I told him, sparing assassins has worked out well for me in the past. Now he's my second."

"And much more than that, I'd gather," the bard teased, delighting in the blush that came to the other woman's cheeks.

"Those are details that you do _not_ need to know, thank you. Not that I would share them anyway. An arlessa can't have all her secrets spread about, now can she?"

Leliana gasped. "You speak as if I would share your secrets with everyone. You should know I would immortalize them in song _first_ and _then _give them away in the guise of a love ballad."

That got the two of them laughing again. Elissa started them walking again, leading her through the halls and pointing out the occupants of the various rooms that they passed. She also informed the bard that she'd be sharing the wing with herself and the senior Wardens, in deference to her position at the Keep.

"Tell me a little about them, Elli?" They'd finally reached her room and Leliana was eagerly exploring her new surroundings while her friend perched on the corner of her bed. Most of her things hadn't arrived yet, but she was assured that she'd have her trunks within a day, two at the most. The bag that she'd brought with her held the things that she would not risk letting another transport for her.

"Well, you already know Oghren, so that will save me a bit there," Elissa began with a chuckle. "And I'm not entirely certain you'll actually get to meet Velanna while you're here. She doesn't spend a lot of time in the Keep, preferring to patrol the lands instead. She's from one of the local Dalish tribes. I make her report in now and again, but I suppose I can't really stop her from wandering."

"We both know how little they like to be tied to any one place. Is she a warrior, then, like yourself?"

Elissa shook her head. "She was a Keeper's first, I think, before-" She stopped herself. "Before she left the clan." There was more to it than that, but Leliana knew that tone. She'd get no answers from her friend, no matter how hard she plied her. "She's a very powerful mage, but her talents are better suited out there." She gestured toward the window. "And she is also better suited roaming around on her own."

"Charming girl, then?" The red-head arched a brow.

"Do you remember what Morrigan was like?"

Leliana's lips formed a little "Oh" at the explanation. "And Anders?" she found herself asking. There was something about the mage's demeanor that made her want to know more about how he'd wound up at Vigil's Keep.

"Apostate," Elissa replied with a chuckle. "He and the templar that were hauling him back to the Circle Tower just happened to be here when the Keep was sacked by darkspawn. He proved himself good in a fight and I didn't like the bitch that came to collect him, so I conscripted him. He's a gifted healer and reminds me a little of Alistair."

The bard saw the look that passed over her friend's face, coming over to embrace her. "A little too much at times?"

Elissa nodded. "They're good memories, though. And Maker bless him, he's made me laugh even at the times when I've wanted to cry."

"He seems a good friend, then."

"A very good one. I hope you like him, too, Leli. You two will probably get along. And Sigrun, too." She smiled, moving on to explain the Legionnaire she'd recruited. "You'll have to help me keep her busy, though. She doesn't like to be idle, unless she's reading. I only wish you'd had a chance to meet Justice. Admittedly, he took some getting used to, but he was...fascinating."

"Now this sounds intriguing. Do tell." Leaving her friend's side, Leliana unpacked her things to the tale of the spirit which had become a Warden, in a rather round-about fashion.

"Are you hungry?" Elissa finally asked. "I know you've been traveling for the better part of the day. Or would you prefer a bath? Or should I just show myself out so you can get some sleep?"

"A bath would be heavenly." She began working herself out of her drakeskin armor. "And if you don't mind my taking supper so late..."

"This is a Warden stronghold, Leliana. The kitchen staff sleeps in shifts."

That got her laughing. "Fair enough. Let me gather something to change into and you can show me to the baths.

Once she had her things, she followed behind the Warden as they picked their way deeper into the Keep. The stories Elissa had told her of her new companions had her intrigued, but none, perhaps moreso than the golden-haired mage who had boldly introduced himself to her. Pity they wouldn't be spending too much time together in the lists and, Maker willing, she wouldn't be needing his services as a healer all that much either.

Still, the notion of seeing him again seemed like it might be an idea worth pursuing in the near future. It was always worthwhile to be on good terms with someone who could patch you up, or at least that was the excuse she was giving herself at that particular moment.


	3. Chapter 3

((Disclaimer, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story.))

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><p>It hadn't taken long for Leliana to fall into the routine of the Keep. She was up with the recruits in the morning, breaking fast with them and taunting her charges with the "tortures" that she was going to put them through that day.<p>

Not that he noticed, mind you, but she always seemed to look immaculate, even in the pre-dawn hours that they kept. It didn't matter if she'd been up half the night chatting with Elissa and Nate or sitting in the library and composing while Sigrun read, or even sharing a mug-or two!-with Oghren, she was always cheerful and more awake than he could say for himself at such hours.

But there he was, up with the recruits. It was Elissa's standing order that a mage be present at all training sessions, either to add to the lesson or, Maker forbid, put someone back together. Thankfully, the worst they'd had to deal with had been a wrenched knee when two of the recruits had gotten tangled up in one another. And since there were so few mages, they rotated the duty, same as those training.

Normally, too, the list was unoccupied, save those slated for practice, but since Leliana's arrival, there seemed to be more and more on-lookers. Elissa had solved that problem by declaring anyone found loitering would have to join in. A few of the more enthusiastic recruits took her up on the offer, but most cleared out after that.

Today was different. Blurry eyed, he'd made his way down to the yard, picking up his pace as he heard the clash of blades fairly _singing_ as they struck each other. He should have expected what he'd seen, but the spectacle before him left him rooted in the doorway.

Nate and Leliana were in the middle of the courtyard, practically dancing around one another, their blades creating a rhythm as they clashed and scraped together. Both were using daggers, blocking with one and feinting with the other, keeping each other at bay. They moved in such a way, too, that neither would give the other their back, circling on guarded steps, watchful for where the next strike would come from.

Anders knew that Nate was at a disadvantage, fighting in the middle of the yard. Much more comfortable with a bow, if he did have to resort to his blades, he preferred to keep to the edge of the battle, a ghost flitting between enemies.

Leliana, on the other hand, seemed comfortable fighting as she was. Her steps were almost a dance, keeping her just out of the other's range. What seemed to be keeping her from completely gaining the upper hand was the fact that Nate had a longer reach and could keep her at a distance. What the other rogue apparently had a hard time guarding against were her legs. More than once, Anders saw her deliver a rather sharp kick to the archer's shin that had him cursing and backing up, putting him on the defensive as she pressed her momentary advantage.

"Where does a lady learn to fight like that?"

She laughed. "When have I ever claimed to be a lady? Darkspawn don't believe in the niceties of a formal duel."

Anders knew that all too well. More times than he cared to count, he found himself readying a spell while Elissa or Justice interposed themselves between him and some nasty looking weapons. You couldn't count on a controlled environment in a battle, but at the same time, you couldn't let yourself...get...distrac-Maker, was she looking at him? He'd surely been standing there long enough, he was surprised they hadn't seen him before this. But no, Leliana had caught sight of him, he was certain of it, her gaze turning in his direction...

For a split second too long. While her attention had been on him, Nate had closed the distance again and she let out a little cry as he stopped his blade close to her neck, her own coming up too late to deflect the blow.

"Finally managed to break your guard," he stated with a smirk, drawing the weapon away from her and sliding both back into their sheaths. He then stuck out a hand to her. "I can see why Elissa brought you here. They're going to learn a lot from you."

He couldn't make out her response, but from Nate's smile, she'd accepted the compliment. As the other man started into the Keep, he caught sight of Anders for the first time.

"Enjoy the show, Mage?" He grinned as he passed him.

"That was a lucky win."

"Don't remind me." A chuckle followed him back inside.

Finally leaving the door, Anders crossed over to where Leliana was resting. She sat on a bench, elbows on her knees and her head bowed. He hoped she was just catching her breath. Losing a practice match wasn't something to be in tears over.

"I'm sorry I cost you the fight," he remarked quietly.

"What?" She picked her head up and there was a flush to her face. Her lips were parted as she caught her breath. "You didn't cause me to lose."

"It just...seemed like I distracted you, that's all. I try to stay out of the way of the pointy bits whenever I can. I guess I didn't stay that far away."

"You...weren't a distraction, Anders. I simply...grew tired, that's all. I let Nathaniel win because I was getting tired."

Somehow, he didn't believe her. He didn't _want_ to believe her. But then, wasn't that his ego, making him think that she'd only lost because she'd caught sight of him? "Right, well," he cleared his throat. "He didn't hit you at all, did he? Need any patching up?"

He reached out, brushing her hair back from her throat to check for any marks that might have been left there. The one thing he _did _notice was that she went very still as he did that. Presumptuous of him again, that she'd be comfortable enough with him to be as familiar as he was with the other soldiers here at the Keep.

She drew back, her eyes turning down for a moment before raising to his again. "I'm fine, thank you. We weren't dueling to blood, since our healer had yet to show himself this morning." A little smile pulled at the corner of her mouth.

"That's not what you should probably say to get me to show up on time from now on, you know." He grinned at her.

"Oh? And what might?"

He was thoughtful for a moment. "How about 'Show up early and I'll let you watch more of my impressive techniques?' I think that might work."

"Impressive, am I?" She arched a brow at him.

"Very much so."

Another smile. "Well, thank you. It has been a very long time since I have needed to draw on those particular talents. It's nice to see that I haven't lost my touch."

The sound of the morning's rotation of trainees interrupted them at that point. Clearing her throat softly, Leliana stood up and walked over to greet them. Not a part of her, gesture or tone, let on to the activity that she had just been doing. As far as they knew, she was only there moments ahead of them.

Anders found himself shaking his head, marveling at her endurance. Surely she could match his fellow Wardens in that regard. She truly was amazing, of that he had no doubt.


	4. Chapter 4

((Disclaimer, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story.))

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><p>It had been a stupid mistake. Letting herself be distracted like that. And yet, somehow her body couldn't help it.<p>

Realizing that Anders had been watching her match with Nathaniel, not knowing how long he'd stood there, brought a flush to her cheeks that she couldn't easily dismiss.

To know that his eyes had been on her, watching her as she shuffled in and out of range of her opponent's daggers. Had he been watching the entire thing? Had he seen her movements? Even though it was a simple sparing match, she suddenly felt very conscious about how she'd been performing.

And those feelings continued through the day's lesson as well. She was constantly aware of his watching her as she put the recruits through their paces.

She kept telling herself it was because he _had_ to. Anders was a healer and he had to be mindful. But that little voice in the back of her mind told her that he needn't be so dutiful. If someone were injured, they'd call out to him

No, he _was_ watching _her_, and it took all of her restraint to keep the flush from her cheeks at that thought. She certainly hadn't sought his attention, but, just as certainly, she wouldn't turn him away.

Turn him away? What was she thinking? He'd been friendly, but that didn't necessarily mean that he was interested. His greeting the first day had simply been...polite. And just now, he'd merely been concerned that she'd been injured during the match. It didn't mean that he was striving for her attention.

Of course, if he _were_, she certainly wouldn't object. He _was_ handsome and Elissa was right. She could see a little of Alistair in his personality, but it was slight. Anders was certainly his own man. Still, from what she'd learned in eavesdropping on her trainees and conversations with the other Wardens, he valued freedom above most everything else and, if the men were to be believed, that included his choices in partners.

"Never seen him with the same girl twice, that's certain," Sigrun had admitted when she sought her confidence. "But then, he's a flirt. Makes the barmaids giggle and delights in seeing if he can coax a blush out of the recruits."

Freedom like that she could understand. While she wasn't quite as cavalier about her partners as Zevran had been, she knew well the risks of getting attached to someone. Being a bard had taught her that you had to be able to flit from partner to partner, to change your attitude to accommodate your role.

She let out a sigh. That life, however, was behind her. Though she never truly forgot her lessons, she was free to pursue her own desires now.

And something about the blonde's crooked smile had her desiring _him_.

"Here you go, Ser." She was drawn from her thoughts by one of the trainees.

"I'm sorry, what?" She realize that the young man was holding out a mug to her, which she reached out and took from him.

"You looked a bit flushed, so we brought some over," he explained with a bit of a grin.

"I...oh, thank you." She nodded to him and quickly took a couple gulps of water. At least some of them were young enough to not quite realize why else she might be blushing, but if she were going to train them properly, she was going to have to stop letting her mind wander.

Of course, the best possible way to do that would probably be to ask Elissa to keep Anders away from the yard.

_You can do this, Leliana. You're not a maiden any longer. You can focus your attention long enough to get through your lessons today._

It was just tomorrow and the days after that she was worried about.

Of course, there were plenty of other things going on that helped occupy her mind away from the mage, the biggest being a ceremony that Elissa was holding within a couple of days where the local banns would be in attendance.

"Mostly a chance for them to get together and squabble and try and impress me," explained the Warden, "but necessary, especially given that there will be several new faces there this year." Her friend's tone betrayed the presence of a story there, which she drew out of her while the two of them picked through Leliana's various garments, trying to find something suitable for her to wear to the occasion.

After wrinkling her nose several times at her mirror, she'd finally settled on a favorite dress of hers. It was a rich, sunset orange that reminded her a little of the robes that she'd worn as a laywoman in the Chantry, and though the color was similar, the cut of it certainly was not. Her shoulders were bare and the neck was just shy of modest. A smooth top gave way to a fuller skirt that began at her hips, accenting her waist rather nicely, she thought with a little smile. It reached to the floor, hiding the shoes that she chose to wear, though the toes of her slippers peeked out with each step, revealing the simple bows that adorned the tops. Not elaborate by any means, they were still comfortable and matched the dress perfectly!

The night of the gathering, she made her way down to the main hall of the keep. From the moment she was announced, she was the focus of several of the attending banns, often times all at once. Most wanted to hear her stories from the Blight and by her second glass of wine, she found herself begging off, promising her would-be audience a grand tale-once she'd finished composing it.

Now that she had time to retreat to a wall and study those gathered, she was enjoying herself more. Her eyes trailed first to Elissa and Nathaniel as they made their rounds amid the guests. She could tell simply by the way her hand rest on his arm or his on her back how much they cared for one another. A smile came to her lips, glad to see her friend happy again.

Turning back to the room, she wasn't sure how it was possible, but she found Anders first. What was even more serendipitous was that he was looking in her direction as she did. He returned her smile, brows arching slightly in question. Before another gesture invited him over, she turned away, sipping from her goblet, and willing her feet to move her away, over to the group attracted by Oghren.

Feeling a touch at her elbow, she turned to meet the mage's inquisitive gaze. "Enjoying one of Oghren's wild tales, my lady?"

She chuckled softly. "This is one I've heard many times. I fear his ending will not surprise me."

"Then, perhaps, you might like someone else to entertain you?" He held out his hand to her.

What harm could it do? It was a simple invitation. Perfectly normal at a gathering such as this one. He was simply being polite. Her being a newcomer to the arling, it would be proper to be escorted by someone whom she'd been introduced to.

Before she could reply, she saw the pinch that came to his smile, watched his fingers curl. She'd debated with herself for too long! Covering his hand with hers, she made certain her expression matched his eager tone. "I would be delighted."

Was it her imagination or had she felt him relax? Surely someone who flirted as much as he had no reason to be nervous. Especially when he was simply being polite to her. She wasn't expecting him to charm her, though she felt a twinge of disappointment when he kept their conversation to simple things, or let those he introduced her to lead the conversation. It was probably just as well. Each time she watched him smile, she thought she might stutter. To counter this, she tried her hardest to keep her attention on their partners rather than him.

After one circuit of the room, Elissa had come over playfully scolding the mage for taking up all of her time when there were 'important guests' who wanted to meet another of Ferelden's heroes. He'd simply given his Commander a grin and relinquished his hold.

"Can you blame me for wanting to keep her to myself?" he'd asked her.

So had he _truly _desired her company or was he simply being polite? She hadn't been trying to read him as much as the others. Something in her wanted to be surprised at what he might do, rather than being able to predict it and either encourage or counter it.

Even after Elissa lead her away, guiding her around to speak more with the banns, she found her thoughts straying as they chatted around her. True, she could likely turn the head of any man present, the one whose attention she most sought was proving difficult. After they'd parted, Anders' attention had gone elsewhere, though giggles usually indicated where he was in the room. While she'd both seen and heard that was simply how he was, she wasn't certain how she felt about it. Even if he were interested in her, how sincere would he be in his affections? Was it worth trying? Or would it be safer to simply continue as they were, whatever that may be?

Unwilling to make up her mind at the moment, she allowed herself to grow lost in the revelry of the rest of the evening, sharing more wine and stories with the gathered nobles. Still, with every flirtatious comment from them or offer of another drink or stroll, she found herself begging off, eyes seeking out the one man she wished would prove himself bold yet again.

The end of the evening had her retiring to her chamber alone, although Varel was polite enough to walk her to her door in lieu of one of the guests. She'd mustered up enough courage to give Anders the opportunity, but the mage had disappeared sometime during the evening, leaving her feeling the slightest bit sorrowful that she'd perhaps missed the chance to have him do so.

Perhaps it was a sign that she wasn't meant to pursue this course, but she couldn't ignore the feeling that she got in her chest whenever she found herself watching him, nor could she deny the way her pulse sped whenever he flashed a smile in her direction.

"Silly lovesick girl," she murmured to herself as she readied for bed.

Lying there in the darkness and silence, though, her mind wandered down rather pleasant imaginings, all stemmed from her brief encounter with the mage this evening. Given that she couldn't stop smiling, she decided how she felt wasn't silly at all.

She could only hope there was a chance he might feel the same.


	5. Chapter 5

((Disclaimer, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story. Shorter chapter, but, well, rather important in the scheme of things, I think.))

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><p>Not even hours after the fealty ceremony, Anders was calling on Elissa rather early the next morning. He'd spent the evening debating this with himself and was determined to set things in motion before his mind could catch up with him and tell him what a disaster this idea would likely turn out to be.<p>

"Is something wrong?" Obviously he needed to rouse himself sooner if that was her first reaction.

"No. No emergencies or anything of that sort. I was hoping we could maybe...talk?"

That got her to pause. "About?" She motioned toward one of the chairs.

Anders cleared his throat and took a deep breath. "Leliana."

He had Elissa's full attention at that, suddenly feeling as if he'd just been hauled into the First Enchanter's office for being caught scribbling in the books again. She said nothing, though, merely taking the chair beside him and curling up in it, waiting for him to continue.

"I thought I might ask you, since you're probably the closest to family that she has here. I want...I want your permission to...to court her."

One of her brows arched and she gave him a puzzled look. "Courting? That's something I'd never though myself in a position to...grant. What brought this on, if you don't mind my asking?"

"I…I'm finding myself rather taken with her, Commander. She's all I've been thinking about, ever since you introduced us. I can't get that moment out of my mind. Her smile. Her eyes. Even the way she smelled. And I'm finding excuses to just be where she is whenever I can. But I-" Maker, he _did_ feel like an apprentice again. "I'm not certain if I should...if I _can_ speak with her about it. How I feel, I mean. But I'd like to try."

"You do perfectly well speaking to women, Anders, if my kitchen staff and half the barmaids in Amaranthine are to be believed." She rewarded him with a bit of a smirk. He supposed he deserved it.

"That's different." He shook his head. "That's not what I want."

"Not what you want? What do you want, then?"

"As I said, I want to court her, but I," he dropped his gaze. "I don't know how. Y'see, we simply didn't _do that_ in the Tower. You couldn't. Not with _everyone_ watching. Sure, it was possible, but if you were caught, you were usually hauled into the First Enchanter's office for a little _talk_.

"We weren't...discouraged, but Maker! It was embarrassing! Getting lectured on propriety and, well, the last thing the Chantry wants is _more_ mages, so we get _that_ talk, too. Instead of...of..." He stopped, letting out a frustrated noise, running his hands through his hair. "I think if they didn't treat intimacies like some sort of taboo, we wouldn't have these problems. There, I said it."

"You said a great deal," Elissa quipped. "But I understand."

"Good. Because I'm not sure I do. I want...I want to do this _properly_." He sighed. "Like I saw Nathaniel do for you. But Leliana and I are different people. I'm not sure his methods would work."

A slight blush came to her cheeks and she looked flattered. "He _was _a little more physical in his means of catching my attention. You and Leli don't exactly have blades and bows in common."

"What can I do, then?"

She pressed her fingers to her lips as she did when thinking. "Do what you do best: talk." She smiled. "Leli loves stories. I'm sure you could start there. Then...do what feels right."

"I'm afraid of that. What if I insult her? Or make an ass of myself?"

"Well, if you insult her, expect to find a dagger somewhere unpleasant." Her smile assured him she wasn't entirely joking. "And if you make yourself the fool, you'll at least have made her laugh-and given yourselves more to talk about."

He listened, taking in her advice and determined to follow it his own way. It wouldn't do to try and fit it to the letter, not when he was so bad at following the rules. "I appreciate this, Elissa. I really do."

"I appreciate you having sense enough to ask."

He smiled. "It seemed right. Especially regarding her."

As he got up to leave, she muttered, "Andraste's Grace, Anders."

He held up his hands. "What? I thought asking would be-"

"The scent. It's a white flower called Andraste's Grace. The scent reminds her of her mother."

"Oh," he breathed out as he took in the information, then a smile came to his lips. "Thank you, Commander. I'll remember that."


	6. Chapter 6

((Disclaimer, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story.))

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><p>It had started out simple enough. Anders managed to catch her in the hall, asking if she'd like to sit with him during dinner.<p>

From there, conversation had seemed natural enough. The two of them didn't exactly get to spend a lot of time together, so taking the opportunity to talk and get to know more about one another didn't seem so out of place.

Then, running into him in the library wasn't anything out of the ordinary. He _was_ a mage, after all, and it seemed perfectly normal.

And she was getting better at having him mind her training sessions, not finding him as much of a distraction. It helped that he seemed to be present at many of them, despite the fact that she knew the mages took turns doing so. Still, he would often stay behind to help her tidy up the practice gear, asking her questions about tactics, her favored techniques, and seeming genuinely interested in her way of fighting.

"You're much more...personal than Nathaniel is," he remarked. "He prefers his bow."

"Oh, I do, too," she replied with a smile. "But the darkspawn don't always stay far away."

"Of that I'm well aware," he chuckled. "Unless, well, I magic them in place."

"Wynne could do that. Very handy."

"Wynne? Ah, I remember Wynne! She was always fun to tease. Sharp, too. Gave as good as she got."

"You knew her from the Tower, then?"

That prompt began several stories of his time actually in the Circle, which prompted _more_ stories of his _seven_ escape attempts, something Elissa had failed to mention. He teased her with the notion he wasn't telling her everything, which, of course, meant she would have to accept his invitations to carry on their discussions.

Often, they would meet after their evening meal or she would coax them out of him after training. And she wasn't content to simply be an audience, weaving tales of the Blight or simply sharing stories with a more personal touch whenever the opportunity arose.

It was then she was most comfortable. She was a bard, after all, and entertaining was what she loved to do. But it was different with Anders. Every story she told, be it one she lived or one she knew, he sat and _listened_ to her. It was these times he was actually still, sitting in and taking in every word of them.

One particular evening, they were settled in their usual place in the library: the floor in front of the fireplace. It had started getting chilly in the evenings, so he'd smuggled a blanket out of one of the stores and draped it around her shoulders as he settled beside her.

"You never did answer me," he remarked quietly.

"About what?"

"Well, you told me that you grew up in Orlais, but were born here in Ferelden. You never told me why you came home."

She grew quiet at that, absently pulling the blanket a little tighter around her shoulders. Her attention drifted away from him to a spot on the floor beyond her feet. Months. It had taken months for her to trust Elissa enough with her story and yet, as soon as Anders had asked, she'd wanted to tell him.

_What harm could it do?_ she asked herself. _That part of your life is behind you now. And he's been nothing but honest with you._

Not to mention how strange it was, but she felt safe with him almost immediately. Something in her wanted a closeness between the two of them, wanted to know what it would feel like to have his arms around her as he simply held her. A little smile came to her lips as she wondered what his heartbeat would sound like.

"Oh!"

She was suddenly staring down at a pair of fair eyes and a playful smirk. Anders had stretched out and pillowed his head on her lap.

"If you don't want to tell me, I understand. It's just that, well, you were wandering away from me and I thought I should bring you back."

Her fingers settled in his hair, combing her nails lightly along his scalp. "It's not that. It's just..." She sighed, her attention turning downward once more and finding nothing but curiosity and perhaps a touch of worry in those soft eyes. She gave him a smile and took another breath.

"As I've told you, I was once a bard in Orlais. I had a mistress who taught me everything that I needed to know to survive as one..."

By the time her tale was concluded, they'd just about changed positions. Anders was sitting up again and she found herself leaning against him. His arm draped slightly around her back, keeping her close but not holding her to him. She could still slip free, if she truly wanted to. Glancing up, she saw a peculiar smile on his face.

"What are you thinking?"

"Hmm? Oh, nothing too terrible," he chuckled. "Just that if the sisters we had in the Tower had been anything like you, I don't think I'd have tried to run away quite so often."

Leliana felt the blush rising to her cheeks again. "It doesn't bother you?" She hoped to deflect from that with her question.

"What?"

"That I did all those things?"

He brought his hand over, lightly resting it on top of hers. "What we do makes us who we are, Leliana. Every time we make a choice, it changes us a little. Would you be the same woman if you'd made different choices in your life? If you hadn't become a bard, you never would have wound up here in Ferelden. And, well, I can't say that we might not have ever met, because believe me, I thought about running away to Orlais several times," he laughed. "But we wouldn't have met _now_. Like this." He brought his arm up and draped it lightly across her shoulders.

"And I'm very happy to have met you, Anders." She turned her gaze up to him again.

"Wow, you're the first person that's told me that in a very long time. Usually it's 'You're so frustrating, I could scream' or 'Now what did you do?' or, my personal favorite, the long-suffering sigh. It's amazing how expressive one little gesture can be, isn't it?"

She couldn't help it. Given the expression he was making along with his comments, she started giggling, bringing her hand up to cover her lips. His own came up, drawing it away.

"You should never hide a smile so lovely."

And she found herself smiling, truly smiling, at those words. She'd been taught it wasn't proper to laugh too loudly, but something in his encouragement warmed her. That he noticed her smile spoke a lot for him...and his affect on her, if he could, indeed, make her smile like that.

He lowered their joined hands just in time to have them bumped by something warm and fuzzy. With a meow and a little squeak, Ser Pounce-a-Lot padded into the mage's lap and promptly curled up.

"It looks as though someone else is wanting of your attention," she said with a soft laugh.

One of his brows arched. "Someone _else_?" A little smile pulled at his lips.

She just smiled in return, tucking a few strands of hair behind her ear. It certainly wasn't lost on her that his eyes followed the gesture before returning to watching her.

"I thought to ask you," he said after a few more minutes of silence, "if you'd be interested in accompanying me to the city. Near as I can recall, you haven't been there yet and Elissa pulled rank on me and is sending me there to take care of a few things. If you're interested. It'll be a journey of a couple of days, but somehow I don't think that's a problem for you." He smiled.

Leliana thought for a moment over the invitation. It would be a good opportunity for her to finally visit Amaranthine proper and, well, though they were going there on what was likely Warden business, she had a feeling that Anders wouldn't be asking if he didn't have something in mind. At least, that's what she was hoping.

"I think I'd like that."

"Really? I'll make the extra preparations, then. I just hope telling you I'm supposed to be leaving tomorrow isn't too soon?"

The sheepish look on his face made her laugh again. "I'll be fine. In fact, given how much I know you love mornings, I'd make a wager that I might even be ready before you."

"Hmm, and what would the wager be?" He was giving her a cocky look, coupled with arched brows.

"As a rule, I never gamble like that among friends, so why don't we keep it simple. The loser has to buy the winner," she thought for a moment, "two drinks."

"You have yourself a wager, my lady." He stuck out his hand and the two of them shook on it. "Come on, Pounce. We'd best turn in early if we're going to win ourselves some free ale."

She found herself laughing at that as well, though he wasn't in a hurry to rush off. Gathering up the kitten in one arm, he held out his hand to her, helping her to her feet and then bending down to pick up the blanket as well.

"See you in the morning, Anders. Bright and early," she teased as they finally parted.

Though it was late, she took a little time to at least begin packing, that way she could give herself a bit of a head start for the morning. Thinking about their playful bet, she couldn't help but giggle to herself as she readied for bed, finding herself too excited to sleep for a time. When she finally did slip into slumber, it was to more smiles and even more playful thoughts.


	7. Chapter 7

((Disclaimer, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story. Guess who had a bit of a weekend and forgot to update. Doh!))

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><p>He lost the bet, of course.<p>

Arriving in the main hall, he found Leliana sitting on one of the benches, lazily kicking her feet and humming to herself. She made a show of yawning and stretching though she certainly didn't look like she was still tired. In fact, she looked as though they should have been on the road several hours ago.

Then again, that had been his plan all along.

When she'd suggested the bet, he saw it as the perfect opportunity to, well, buy her something to drink without being very obvious about it. If she thought they were playing around, it might make things easier to accept than him seeming to be plying her with alcohol.

Not that he was considering plying, mind you, but he was no fool when it came to knowing his reputation within the Vigil. Certainly Leliana had to have at least discovered one or two stories, or, at the very least, been made to listen to one or two. And yet, she still agreed to accompany him. The Maker moved in mysterious ways.

Of course, it probably would have been better if he'd remembered his reputation here in _Amaranthine_ rather than just be worried about the Keep.

Their task had been completed without incident. Elissa had wanted him to check on some deliveries, touch base with a few of their contacts, and, "For Maker's sake, don't antagonize the Templar while you're there."

Easier said than done, when Leliana had insisted upon visiting the Chantry while they were there. His saving grace had been that he was known as a member of the Grey and he'd practically been Elissa's other shadow during the time that she was overseeing the reconstruction of the city. It was still coming along, but the people were really putting all they had into it. If he didn't know any better, he'd swear they were trying to make the city better than it was before.

What it meant, though, was that the Templar here in the city knew him and so long as he didn't cause any trouble, they left him alone. It didn't stop him from being nervous about being there, though, but watching Leliana as she walked the aisle of the chantry to the podium where sermons were delivered was a delight. If he had to compare it to anything, it would have been his first time leaving the Vigil as a Warden. Certainly there was nothing spectacular about the sights. He'd seen a few chantries on his travels and they all seemed quite similar and there was nothing overly special about the Keep's courtyard, and yet, seeing them for the first time, with a newcomer's reverence; or better yet, seeing that reverence in someone else's expression made it seem new again to him as well.

When she'd finished exploring the building proper, she took a moment to speak with the Revered Mother, something that had Anders wincing. Not a few moments into her conversation, he appeared at her side.

"Leliana, my dear, we still have to pick up those bundles from...the..." He hadn't thought this bit through. "Place. With the packages. That have our things in them."

Definitely not his smoothest escape attempt, but it seemed to work.

"You're quite right, Anders. Thank you. If you'll excuse us, Your Grace." She bobbed her head to the older woman, who just frowned at Anders as he lead her off. "Maker, thank you. I realized my mistake as soon as I introduced myself."

Anders chuckled. "You should have been there the time the Commander," he glanced around to make sure they wouldn't be overheard, "spread rashvine all over the woman's bed."

Leliana jerked to a stop. "She did _not_!"

"She did. I was there when she snuck in and everything." He grinned. "Of course, at the time, we thought it was just fragrant herbs to make her room smell better. At least that's what the Orphans told us."

"Orphans?" She didn't look like she believed him.

"I'll tell you over a drink," he promised, leading her once again toward the door, down the steps, and over to the Crown and Lion.

Before ordering that, he secured the two of them rooms for the evening. It was too late to start back to the Vigil at this hour. Better to get going in the morning. For now, though, there were drinks to be enjoyed and more tales to be woven. But first, he needed a rest.

Anders sagged against the table, arms on the wood and chin on those. "Elissa is going to be the death of me. Running me ragged like this."

"You should have been with her during the Blight. I believe I've set foot in every inch of Ferelden."

"Hmm. You know, we've shared heroic stories of our illustrious commander. What about the not so illustrious ones?" He gave her a sly look.

"Gossip? Is that what you wish?" Her lips quirked a little.

"Would an ale or two make the notion more palatable?"

"Well, since you're offering..."

Chuckling, he got up and headed to the bar for the aforementioned drinks. While he was waiting, he suddenly felt arms around him, followed by a delighted "Anders! You're back!"

Extracting himself from the embrace, he found a petite brunette with tight curls staring at him with a smile on her face. His mind whirled for a moment. "Um, er, hello, M-Mah-May. May."

"It's been a while, stranger!" The bartender set down his mugs. "Ooh, you're not one to waste time, are you?" She scooped one into her hand and took a gulp from it before he could protest.

"It...has." He didn't dare look over in Leliana's direction. "And, unfortunately, it will have to be longer. I'm here on business."

"Since when has that stopped you from having a good time?" She attempted to snake her arm around his neck.

He ducked away. "May, please." He shook his head. "I can't. Not tonight. Not any night. Not anymore."

She stopped, mug halfway to her lips. "What?"

"I...There's someone I'm...with." He gave her a telling look.

A snort escaped her. "You were _with_ me last time. And that blonde Antivan girl the time before that. And then there were those two-"

"May, stop," he hissed. "That was...before. I've...settled. I'm not...not interested in-"

"Settled?" Her brows arched and she all but laughed out the word. "You?"

He frowned. "Yes. I met someone who-"

"Oh, I see. You just met a new girl, that's all." Her scowl relaxed. "You know, if you'd like, we-"

"No," came out through grit teeth. "I don't want anyone else. Just her."

She huffed a breath out of her nose. "So that's it, huh? Some new chit strikes your fancy and I'm not good enough anymore?"

It was his turn to scowl. "I made it _very_ clear that I wasn't interested in more than a night or two."

"And yet you're _settling_ for...for what?" Her eyes cast around the bar and he knew she saw his staff near the table. "That red-headed little tart over there? I could snap her in half."

Anders barked a laugh. "I'd like to see you try," he muttered. "And I'd ask that you don't talk about her that way."

"Oh, you _ask_ do you? Well, here's what I think of you, your little princess there, and your _settling_." She dashed the rest of the ale in his face and stormed off.

Clearing his eyes, he meekly asked for a towel and another ale. As he was wiping his face, he felt slim fingers brush over his own, taking the rag and tending to him.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," he mumbled.

"She wasn't very happy with you, was she?" Leliana gave him a crooked smile.

"I make it very clear to people I'm with that it's...casual. No commitment. Most understand. Some...don't."

She laughed softly. "You act as though you're the only one whose had a jealous paramour." Something about her smile seemed a little forced, though.

"Still, not quite how I wanted to address that aspect of my life." He gave her an apologetic smile. "And I still owe you an ale." He pushed the mug toward her.

"Thank you."

She was a bit more subdued after that, as was he. Their plans of gossip were forgotten in favor of a meal and an early start. If they pushed, they'd be back at the Keep by nightfall, and that option sounded good right now.

Tossing about in his bed, his mind swirled over the exchange, whether it could have gone better, or if he could or should have warned Leliana what they might encounter. He sighed. It was over and done and she seemed to be taking it well. Though her expression nagged at him. Something about the exchange bothered her, but he couldn't place what.

Halfway back to Vigil's Keep, it hit him.

"You thought I meant you, didn't you?" He stopped, putting himself in front of her.

"What?"

"When I said no commitments. You thought I was talking about us, too."

"With what I've heard of your past, Anders, can you blame me?"

He gave her a wry smile. "Not really. But I meant the other things I said, too. About finding someone who meant more to me than just something fleeting."

"Have you?"

He nodded slowly, bringing his gaze up to meet hers. "I have."

A tinge of pink bloomed across her cheeks and she let out a soft, almost embarrassed little laugh. Taking a breath, she put her attention back on him. "Well, if that's the case, are there any more surprises I should know about like your friend May?"

"Something tells me that if I tell all of those, you'll change your mind about me."

"Hmm. You'll just have to take a chance on that, won't you?"

He chuckled. "And taking chances seems to be what I do best."

And so, he found himself trading more stories with her the rest of the way back. In addition to clearing secrets between them, it also helped pass the time. Still, it was practically the middle of the night by the time they were safely inside its walls again.

Engrossed in their talk, they truly didn't stop until they stood outside her door.

"Thank you for accompanying me, Leliana. Having you with me made this trip more than pleasant."

"Well, I certainly got to experience a good deal. Perhaps we'll have to go exploring through the streets sometime again soon?"

"I think I like that idea." He reached out and took her hand, bringing it to his lips before letting her slip away.

"Good night, Anders." She took a step back, stopping in the doorway and laid a hand on the frame, giving him a little smile as she did so.

"Good night, Leliana." He hesitated for a heartbeat and then reached up, fingers dusting her cheek, his hand cupping there as he held her, leaning close to let his lips brush against hers. Hearing a soft sigh, he firmed up the kiss slightly, deepening it with gentle tugs on her lower lip, but at the same time, keeping it almost chaste.

Drawing back, he caught the hitch in her breathing, barely hearing it over his own deep breaths. Licking his lips, he gave her a smile. "See you in the morning." And with a bow, he turned and made himself walk away from the door, letting out the breath he'd been holding when he finally heard it click shut.

Passing the entrance to his own room, he found another door that was just as familiar to him. Letting himself in, he stopped with his back pressed against it.

"Nate! You'll never believe what just happened!"

If he hadn't been so giddy, he likely wouldn't have missed the feminine squeak that came from the direction of the bed. As it was, the shuffling drew his attention and as he crossed over to talk to his friend, he found that Nathaniel wasn't alone in the bed.

Elissa was lying beside him, the covers pulled up to nearly her shoulders and Nate's chest. From the position of his arm, Nate had it wrapped around her back, allowing her to cuddle so close. "Anders," she said by way of greeting, though her voice seemed a little strained.

He rubbed his face with his hands, letting his fingers drag slowly over his lips. "Leliana kissed me," he stated, unable to keep the smile off of his face. "Well, all right, it was more that I kissed her, but she kissed me _back_. It was...wonderful. She's so sweet!"

Nathaniel cleared his throat, scratching a hand through his hair as he stared at the mage beside his bed. "Anders, you know that any other time I would be _immeasurably_ happy for you, but don't you think this is something better suited to tell me in the morning?"

Stopping his pacing, Anders blinked as he looked over at the rogue. "I...I'm sorry. I just...It just happened and it wasn't like I planned it or anything, but that makes for the best reactions, right? Being spontaneous?" He went back to following the perimeter of the rug Nathaniel had laying on his floor.

"Spontaneity is definitely something that makes a relationship interesting," the dark-haired man agreed.

"And it's likely good you didn't push things further than that," Elissa added. "Leli hasn't been very close to anyone since I've known her. I'm sure she appreciates you taking things slow."

"You really think that?" Anders stilled again and turned to face the pair in the bed. "I just...I have been simply because I didn't want to make an ass out of myself."

"Yes, that's definitely something you'd want to avoid." Nate sucked on a tooth, raising his eyebrows as he concluded the statement.

"You...you don't think I'm taking things _too_ slowly, do you? I mean, she kissed me...back. That's got to tell her that I...like her, doesn't it? And I doubt she'd have let me if she weren't interested herself. I just...I'm so afraid someone else might...might..."

"Steal her away?" Elissa concluded for him. He nodded vigorously. "Anders, Leliana knows when a man is interested in her and if she didn't feel the same way, you'd know."

"I know. I just...I've never really...I told you that it wasn't like this in the tower. I want to know...I want to be sure that I'm doing this _right_."

"You are," she affirmed. "She certainly hasn't come complaining to me about your attentions, that much I can tell you."

"She...talks to you about me?"

Nate let out a soft groan. "Mage, it's the middle of the night. You can have tea and gossip with the commander _tomorrow_. Is that agreeable?"

"But I-" Anders blinked again, noticing for the first time that the two of them _were_ in the bed together. He thought nothing of the fact that Nate was shirtless, but the way the commander had the covers tucked around her, not to mention the flush that was on her cheeks... "Oh. Oh! Oh, Maker! I'm sorry! I'm _so _sorry!"

Hiding his face in his hands for a brief instant, he suddenly turned and fled out the door, a flush burning up from the base of his neck. Once he was safely entrenched in his room, he paced around, hands covering his mouth and nose, rocking a little as the realization of what he'd done finally hit him. Sitting down on his bed, he ran both hands through his hair.

Nate and Elissa had been...and he'd...but Leliana had...

That last thought had him smiling again and the elation of what had happened refused to keep his mood dampened for very long.

"She kissed me," he breathed out softly, the words followed by another delighted laugh. "And you two should learn to lock your door!" he called to no one in particular, since the two he was addressing wouldn't hear him anyway.

Sagging onto his bed with another happy sigh, he flopped back onto the mattress, arms spread.

"She...kissed me."


	8. Chapter 8

((Disclaimer, in that Dragon Age, Awakenings, and the characters therein belong to Bioware and I'm just borrowing them for the sake of a story. Apologies for the yet again late upload, but no worries on lateness after this, since this is the final chapter. Hope you all enjoyed!))

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><p>Leliana stood there, listening to the mage's footsteps as he walked away from her door. Her cheeks tingled with warmth and she could still feel the press of his lips against hers. Bringing her fingers up to brush over them, a smile accompanied the soft giggle that bubbled up from her chest.<p>

Spinning on her toes, she prepared herself for bed, humming quietly as she did so. Pausing in front of the vanity that had been provided for her, she scooped up her brush and began running it through her hair. It was beginning to get long again and she wasn't certain that she wanted to have it cut off once more. Staring at herself in the mirror, she found herself wondering what Anders would think. If he'd prefer running his hands through it as it were now or if it were longer. His own came to near his shoulders, so it was possible he preferred length. Perhaps she'd have to see what he thought the next time that they talked.

_Would there be a time for that? _she mused. A small part of her worried that they might lose what they had built together. Given what had just transpired, she shouldn't think that way, but past experiences began to creep their way into her thoughts.

_He wouldn't have kissed you if he didn't feel something for you,_ she told herself. At least that was what she hoped. Given what they'd talked about on their way home, she was nearly certain the kiss had been something more than a passing fancy.

Getting the answers she wished out of the mage, however, was beginning to prove difficult. Whenever they were together, Anders seemed...distant. It was as if after their kiss, he didn't wish to be so close. He wasn't avoiding her, but the little intimacies they shared had all but stopped. And any time she thought to bring up the conversation, he'd deflect it or he would make some excuse to leave.

"Something's on your mind." Nathaniel reached down to help her up after tripping her for the second time during their sparring match that day.

"I know. I'm sorry. I just-" She cast her eyes to the mage watching over them. Anders had missed the last two sessions.

He followed her gaze. "I think I'm beginning to see."

"That obvious?" she asked sheepishly.

"No, but I'm able to put a few things together."

She sighed. "You are his confidant, Nathaniel, are you not? Did I..." She worried her lip. "Did I do something to push him away?"

He almost looked startled at that. "Oh, Maker, no." He shook his head. "Nothing of the sort. If nothing else, you helped him settle down. And all without him even realizing it." He added the last part with a chuckle.

Perhaps that was the problem, then. He was feeling confined by her presence. "Have I?" She fidgeted with the pommel of her dagger. "Is that a good thing? Him settling?" She thought more about the talks that they'd had, about how he valued freedom above all else. The last thing she wanted was to take that away from him.

"Probably not the right word." Nathaniel grew quiet for a moment, a little smile coming to his lips. "You make him happy, Leliana. I've known him for some time and this is the most content I've ever seen him. He was giddy enough to be free of the Circle. Chattered _endlessly_ about it. Now, he's very quiet, but he gets this...smile that tells me he's thinking about you."

"Are you sure it's me he's thinking about?" She almost didn't want to ask that question, but if she wanted to be certain, she needed to know.

"Oh, I'm quite sure. There's no denying that wistful look that comes over his face and the fact that he's very easily distracted when he's like that." A smirk played over the dark-haired man's lips, though it faded when he saw the frown on her own. "What's troubling you, Leliana?"

She let out a sigh. The last thing that she wanted to do was to burden someone else with her own troubles, but she'd been unable to figure out what was going on with the mage herself, so perhaps an outside approach might be necessary.

"I...you say he thinks of me? Then why is it when we're not together? If I'm with him, he stares off, barely hearing me. He doesn't," she made a helpless gesture that encompassed the yard, "come here any more. He told me how he felt about the two of us and now he seems to be doing the complete opposite of it. I don't understand."

The other rogue shook his head and motioned for her to head over to one of the resting benches along the fence.

"You're not frightening him away, if that's your fear, Leliana. Anders is...well, it's hard not to hear of his reputation. This is new to him and he's afraid of making a mistake."

"So he avoids me instead?"

"I don't pretend to know his mind." He let out a bit of a sigh. "Try catching him somewhere that he can't run and...reassuring him. He'll kill me for telling you this, but I don't wish to see you so troubled. And Maker knows, it might help him as well." He chuckled. "He's just as uncertain as you are and, I think, at a bit of a loss."

"Well, that's silly." She shook her head. "He has nothing to worry about. Is _that _why he changed?"

"It could very well be. He might be afraid how he acted before will chase you away."

"Silly mage," she muttered.

"Isn't he?" Nathaniel looked thoughtful. "Why not let me have the recruits for today? I'll put them through some archery paces. You go find that mage and beat some sense into him."

She smiled. "Thank you, Nathaniel. I'll make myself scarce before the recruits arrive."

"Try the workshop. I think I saw him there earlier."

"Thank you!" She waved back to him and after shedding armor and weapons, she made her way there.

Pushing the door open slightly, she heard the rattle of the mixing devices and a smattering of curses that made her chuckle softly. Not wishing to startle him, she slipped in and shut the door with a soft click. Waiting until he set down the potion he was working on, she cleared her throat. "Good morning, Anders."

He still jumped, but actually smiled when he saw her. Then his expression turned to one of concern. "Leliana? Is everything all right?"

She nodded. "I'm here to visit, not for healing," she assured him, watching him relax. She could ask him right away, but that might put him on guard. Better to ease into it. "What are you working on?"

"Draughts to help refresh us during combat. The apothecary in Amaranthine put me on the idea."

She moved next to him. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

"I've got things under-" He paused, frowning, then a little smile pulled at his lips. "I mean, well, if you'd like. It's mostly measuring and mixing right now."

"Just show me what to do."

They spent the morning and through lunch working together. They talked little, but he seemed more relaxed around her. When they broke for an afternoon meal, she finally broached the subject.

Anders hung his head, looking almost dejected. "I'm sorry. I...You had it right. I'm...afraid. I don't want this to be fleeting and I don't want to rush into things. But I shouldn't be afraid to take a risk, should I?"

She smiled at him. "No, you shouldn't."

"You'll forgive a fool, then?" He looked at her almost expectantly, still nervous.

"Why wouldn't I?" Threading her fingers into his hair, she drew his lips to hers and coaxed him into a warm kiss.

When they parted, he was smiling. "I was going to give you this, as an apology, but I think a simple gift is much better."

He drew out a stoppered bottle from his pouch and handed it to her. At his urging, she opened it, a familiar scent wafting from it.

"Is this-?"

"Distilled in oils, so you can wear it whenever you wish."

"So sweet! Thank you!" She wrapped her arms around his neck, giving him another kiss.

His hands settled around her waist in reaction to the gesture. "Mmm. If I'd known that would be my thanks, I'd have given it to you sooner."

She laughed softly, brushing her fingertips through the hair at his temple. Leaning closer, she rest a cheek against his shoulder, finding comfort in his embrace. "I almost wish Elissa were having another gathering of her banns. Then I would have a reason to dress up and wear my lovely new present."

"Do you need to dress up for that? I thought to make something you could have any time."

Picking her head up, she flashed him an impish smile. "But what lady doesn't like a chance to dress up as well?"

"Ask Elissa that question," he replied with a laugh, then grew thoughtful. "And who needs the banns to dress up? Meet me for dinner tonight, in my room." He stepped apart from her, taking her hand in his and dusting his lips over her knuckles. "I look forward to sharing a meal with lovely company."

And that had been several hours ago. Now she was fretting in front of the mirror again. Her gaze kept drifting to her orange dress, but he'd already seen her in that. Still, nothing else seemed quite right. And would he truly care if it were the same? Or would it only matter that she were in her finery?

Taking a deep breath to stir away the butterflies, she made her decision, finishing off her outfit with dabs of the perfume at her wrists and neck. Thankfully, as she and Anders were in the same wing of the keep, she reached his door without any questions or puzzled glances.

He answered her knock by drawing the door open wide. Of course, the first thing that she noticed was him, or rather, the cut of the robes he was wearing. They were Tevinter style, but different than the ones she was certain he was normally in. They seemed suited for someone of a much higher position than a Grey Warden mage who ran around in the Deep Roads or the woods all the time. His hair was pulled back, as usual, and due to her delight at seeing him, it took her a moment to realize that he'd shaved as well.

"Good evening." She couldn't help but smile as she offered her hand.

"Good evening, my lady." He kissed her hand in greeting, but instead of releasing it, she felt him smile and then turn her wrist gently so that he could lay a kiss against there as well. "Please. Dinner awaits."

He lead her into the room and helped her into one of the chairs that were there, returning to shut the door before joining her. It was very intimate, that she noticed right away, and felt her butterflies settling again. Candles illuminated the room from the table and a few shelves around them, the light glinting off the glass of the wine bottle he was currently using to fill their goblets. Two covered plates sat at each of their chairs, the domes doing little to mask the scent of the roast beneath them. He drew the lids away with a flourish, revealing a meal that obviously had a lot of care put into it, given there were other foods accompanying the meat, all dished out as well.

"So where is our chaperone this evening? I don't see him begging for scraps," she asked midway into the meal.

"I asked Sigrun to mind him this evening. I thought he might be a bit of a distraction. Especially after he tried at least three times to make sure that my robe was, in fact, dead and the trim in need of a good batting around."

"It's good that he looks after you so," she teased, taking a sip of her wine.

"He does, indeed. But there are times when I need advice and all he can suggest is looking adorable and scampering away before someone realizes you're the one that's upset everything."

"Hmm, that actually seems like very good advice. He is wise, your Ser Pounce-a-Lot."

"Aye, but there was one problem he couldn't help me with. Except for, perhaps, the looking adorable part. So I am very grateful a dear friend saw fit to make me face what it was that was troubling me."

"Your friend is also very wise, it would seem."

"She is. And clever. Strong. And stunningly beautiful."

"My, this is a friend indeed. You seem lucky to have her."

"I thank the Maker every day that I do." He rose from his chair, moving over to her side and sunk down, kneeling beside her on one knee. They joined hands, fingers threading between one another. "Though in truth, it's she that has me, completely."

Brushing the fingers of her free hand along his jaw, she raised his chin, urging him to his feet once again and joining him, never once breaking the hold they already shared. Laying a kiss or two against his lips, she saw him smile as she felt one gracing her own features.

"I feel as though I am the lucky one," she whispered. "I never dreamed of finding someone who makes me feel as I do with you, Anders. You are not the only one who thanks the Maker for his blessings."

They stood there for several heartbeats, each holding the other in an embrace that conveyed more feeling than either could put into words. She felt safe in his arms. Warm. Loved. And from the gentle sigh she heard, she knew he felt the same.

"I suppose this is the part where I whisk you off into a...grand spectacle of a dance that shows everyone how happy we are together, but alas, we seem to be lacking both music and an audience," he chuckled softly in her ear. "Not to mention the fact that I haven't a notion how."

She laughed, pecking his cheek before drawing back. "Fortunately, you have me to help you with that."

Humming softly, she settled his hands around her and began slowly leading him through very simple steps. He was a quick learner, though, and soon, so long as they didn't try anything fancy, he was guiding her around the small space of his room, humming along with her to provide them with a proper tune.

Both laughing after they finished, he reached up, brushing some of her hair back behind her ear. "Thank you, Leliana. Not quite the dashing figure I hoped to impress you with, but I much preferred this over sweeping you off your feet."

"There are many ways to do that, Anders. Consider me swept." She laughed gently.

Silence settled between the two of them again and she found her brow pinching, watching some indecision play over his face. He caught her watching him and favored her with a smile.

"Stay tonight. Please."

His tone was tender, not wanting, and mirrored in his gaze. Something about it made her chest flutter and she couldn't keep a smile off of her face. Instead of answering him with words, she did so with a kiss, one that steadily deepened as he wrapped his arms around her, fingers sliding into her hair, his other hand skimming along her back.

As they parted, he let out a soft chuckle. "And here I thought I was going to have to bribe you with dessert." A little smirk played over his lips.

Laughing, she drew back, tugging him with her to the table again. "Bribe, no. But if you think I'm going to miss it, you are sorely mistaken."

Shaking his head, he chuckled as he helped her into her chair once more. "It never crossed my mind." He paused, taking up their glasses and passing the one to her. "To new beginnings," he murmured.

They chimed together. "And beautiful ones at that," she concluded.


End file.
